Members of a small group led by Bri and Brian Looper. Top row, from left: Avyi Hill, Bri Looper, Mark Hayes, and Brian Looper. Bottom row, from left: Aubree Anderson and Melissa Drost.
For years, work and family demands made it tough for Mark Hayes to find time for a weekly small group. When he finally restarted the habit last year, he made an unexpected but pleasant discovery.
"I was a good number of years older than everyone else there," said Mark, 49. "But it turned out to be a neat thing because it's given me the chance to know people that I probably would have never sat down and have an extended conversation with. It's stretched me to think about what it means to deepen relationships with people outside my immediate circle."
As part of an intergenerational group led by Bri and Brian Looper, Mark has found a weekly rhythm to reflect on his faith with new people of many different ages and life stages.
“It makes you appreciate all that you’ve been through,” Mark said. “It makes you think again about God shaping these big questions of young adulthood about what you’re going to do with your life or who you're going to be.”
If you’re not currently in a small group but are interested in joining, register here and we’ll place you in a group that best meets your needs!
That kind of connection is intentional. Bri Looper, who moved to Durham from California, previously belonged to an intergenerational group out West and saw firsthand how friendships across decades led to a deeper understanding of God’s work in our lives.
"Church is one of those rare places where you can be unified across differences — and different ages," Bri said. "God can use that in really beautiful ways."
When the Loopers’ group meets, they discuss sermons from the current Gospel of Mark series and share time in prayer. Bri notes that the most meaningful moments often come from sharing personal testimonies. By walking through milestones together and describing their struggles with faith, Bri has seen the Holy Spirit deepen friendships. “Learning about people gives us the chance to realize that, wow, God loves all of us through so many different stages of life,” she said.
For Mark, sharing stories and perspectives across ages emphasizes how important small groups can be and the value in not just attending, but sticking to a weekly rhythm when life offers that space: "You're going to find strong relationships by doing something other than sitting in the pew next to someone. You need side-by-side time and moments to encourage others," Mark said.
"There's a lot of things that keep us busy, but when we can think about being part of a small group as much of a service for others as you do for yourself," he added. "When we commit and when we're willing to be open and maybe feel awkward, that's how you build community."
Read more: