By Donna Mutter
Spiritual formation in the tradition of Jesus Christ is the process of transformation of the inmost dimension of the human being, the heart, which is the same as the spirit or will. It is being formed (really, transformed) in such a way that its natural expression comes to be the deeds of Christ done in the power of Christ. - Dallas Willard
Years ago I read about the various ways that different kinds of grain are treated so that they might become most useful. Different grains are dealt with in different ways. But all are transformed by whatever process is used. Isaiah 28 has this to say on the subject -
A heavy sledge is never used to thresh black cumin; rather, it is beaten with a light stick.
A threshing wheel is never rolled on cumin; instead, it is beaten lightly with a flail.
Grain for bread is easily crushed, so he (the farmer) doesn’t keep on pounding it. He threshes it under the wheels of a cart, but he doesn’t pulverize it.
The Lord of Heaven’s Armies is a wonderful teacher, and he gives the farmer great wisdom.
Hmm. In relation to the process of spiritual formation, I have to ask, am I like grain? Has God dealt with me like this? In His wisdom have I been crushed? Threshed? But not pulverized?!
Three stories:
In the beginning…
I was at the University of Cincinnati in the early 1970s. During that time I was approached by:
Two members of the Children of God (a cult) who told me their names were Rebecca and Isaiah. They invited me to come to their commune to have dinner and talk.
The Hare Krishnas in O’Hare airport in Chicago. The same invitation was extended and for the same reason. But, they also wanted a donation to add to their bulging bag of coins.
The Moonies (devotees of the Reverend Sun Myung Moon) in the student union and was encouraged to attend a meeting to be held later that evening.
And more!
It goes without saying, I was confused!!! What was the truth? Who could I believe? This is when I encountered Christ. He spoke to me one day while I was returning from a little Presbyterian Church located in the pine forest of the Kettle Moraine of Wisconsin. And the voice said, “You can know God.” What????!!!! But I said yes to His invitation. And that’s where it all began. The scriptures were opened to me and I read them…ravenously!
Attending the School of Hard Knocks, Lesson 1
Over time I came to live in North Carolina and to attend Blacknall Memorial Presbyterian Church. I met my husband Bob at church. We married and began a family. Our second child, a precious, cherished girl named Lily, was born with Down Syndrome. She had life threatening birth defects as part of the syndrome and died at 3 months. But…we loved her. And she changed our lives forever. God mobilized His body, at Blacknall mainly, but also elsewhere, to help us endure. They did this in very practical ways. Food, childcare, prayers, encouragements, visits at Duke Hospital in the PICU. Sometimes a dark place. And transformation on a major scale began. Lots of tears, anguish, struggle and wrestling with God. But God never let go. And we were changed…a lot! I felt like grain then. Utterly crushed! But not pulverized (destroyed).
Attending the School of Hard Knocks, Lesson 2
Our daughter Hope was in the 2nd grade when Bob lost his job. As things unfolded, he was essentially unemployed for five years. He had small, temporary jobs, yes. But we had been yuppies! Upwardly mobile! However, that was really, truly over. We would never return to that life. This is when we began to know God as our provider. One day at a time. One bill at a time. Transformation!! It was the end of striving for the American Dream. It was the dawning of the realization that God has His own dream.
Our devotion time together became vital. Utterly life giving. How do you keep putting one foot in front of the other? Prayer!! By diving into God’s life giving words every morning and prayer!
Am I grain? Yes.
Hebrews 12 has this to say about it: God’s discipline is always good for us, so that we might share in his holiness. No discipline is enjoyable while it is happening—it’s painful! But afterward there will be a peaceful harvest of right living for those who are trained in this way.
James 1 puts it like this: When troubles of any kind come your way, consider it an opportunity for great joy. For you know that when your faith is tested, your endurance has a chance to grow. So let it grow, for when your endurance is fully developed, you will be perfect and complete, needing nothing.
These events served to drive me deeper into God’s arms where I found help to endure, hope to hold on, and love to cling to and be changed. Mercy, grace, forgiveness, generosity. These are holy gifts I’ve received. These are holy gifts I now share with the body of Christ and anyone else God directs me to.
